What do you call your vagina - the names pour in.

Two weeks ago I wrote this article for The Sunday Times, it's about how I struggled to find appropriate names for my character's penises and vaginas when I wrote my latest novel, This Way Up.

There are plenty of names out there for our organs, don't get me wrong, but none of them really roll nicely off the tongue - words like 'guava' or 'pork sword' just aren't particularly literary, so I struggled a bit when it came to writing the sex scenes - 'he touched her on her quim' just doesn't sound particularly romantic.

Anyway so I've recieved some great emails from people with their own takes on what we should call our thingies.

Here's one from Kabza who is hilarious:

Reading the above article in your life style edition(May 8) got me laughing and I would like to share some of our kasie names for our members.


Penis - fourfive/njompi/vuvuzela
Vagina - kukunas/khekhe/khekridge or even biscuit


If you go to the loo for a number 1 its called six-nine."O shapa six-nine" meaning u r urinating.
Ta
Kabza

See, as my good friend Wallace always used to say - every day is a school day.

My personal favourites are 'Vuvuzela' for the penis and 'Biscuit' for the vagina.

Brings whole new meaning to 'blowing your vuvuzela', and 'having tea and a biscuit'.

But I have a question, Kabza, why 'fourfive'? Is that the length in feet and inches?